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Showing posts from December, 2020

Living in Squalor!

  I head downstairs, the overwhelming scent of mold permeates throughout the room. Garbage and wet clothes are scattered everywhere and makeshift hammocks adorn the ceiling. A dirty rabbit hutch reeks of urine and feces, and the rotting smell of dead mice or some other mysterious animal buried beneath the filthy ruble burns my nose. As the intense aroma penetrates my eyes, they begin to water incessantly, I don’t think I can handle this. With a trash bag in one hand and plugging my nose with the other, I proceed down into the dingy basement. I  begin wading through the plethora of items in my path, deciding what to keep and what to throw out, I’m disgusted at what I see, my mother would have never let it get like this.  I stand, staring at a massive pile of clothes laying on the damp floor by the washing machine. It feels like just yesterday my mother died and suddenly life went from living in splendor to living in squalor. For me, living in “splendor” didn’t mean living in some extrav

The Old Wooden Stairs

 I can’t seem to take my eyes off of the old wooden staircase in front of me. I scan across it, examining every inch. From afar the solid wood appears to be flawless but the closer you get the more imperfections you can see. Small nicks and tiny pieces of splintered wood peak out of the boards. As I focus on the rickety old railing and the creaky stairs, my mind starts to disconnect from my body, drifting off into a fantasy land. I can feel myself slipping in and out of consciousness, bouncing between fantasy and reality. Every time I feel my nose burn from the stench of alcohol and cigarettes that billow out of his mouth, or the feeling of his sweat dripping down my cheeks, or the weight of his body pressing against me, my mind withdraws from the convalescent fantasy, reentering the crippling reality that I am faced with. I desperately try and retreat from the disabling position that my mind is now stuck in. Paralyzed by the overwhelming agony I am experiencing, I close my eyes and wa

Trapped!

    I am sitting in the living room. I can see a small cockroach crawling across the end table. I watch its antennae move back and forth, examining every object and surface it’s comes in contact with. I see them all over the place. I have learned to sleep with the covers over my head to prevent a cockroach fro m crawling inside of my ear. Sometimes, if there is a cluster of them, you can hear them scurrying around in the darkness. There are so many of them, and they are everywhere. I see them mostly in the kitchen and the living room. Maybe it’s because they are the most frequented areas of the house. A lot of times, whe n you are cooking, you have to carefully examine your food before eating it, there might be a dead cockroach hiding in your rice or mashed potatoes. We are ate a lot of rice, potatoes, spaghetti, ramen noodles, and powdered milk. My dad’s only source of income was from disability, and there were 6 kids still living at home. Of course, his money was well spent on beer a

Foster Care

  When I was taken from my home in the middle of the day, I was panic-stricken. I was scared of what was going to happen next. I had so many questions and the uncertainty of my future frightened me. I spent a short stent with a nice family in the city. From what I can remember it was a young couple, and they had two children; a teenage boy and a toddler. They made every attempt to make me feel welcome and at home.  Coming from poverty and having such a distressing background, it was hard for me to acclimate. They effortlessly included me in everything like family gatherings, games and activities. On the outside I appeared to fit in well. It was easy for me to force a smile. I was good at playing pretend and acting as if nothing was wrong. I was used to hiding my pain, internalizing all of my anguish. I would do this for years to come.  They would pry quite a bit about my home life, I think they were trying to find a way to connect with me or maybe they were just trying to satisfy

Taken!

  It’s mid afternoon, on this  cool, crisp fall day. I can smell the dew on the leaves and fresh cut grass as everyone scrambles to get a final mow in before fall rapidly turns into winter. I am in awe as I look down a tunnel of trees and watch as hues of red and orange dance in the wind. My cheeks are tinted slightly pink as the wind brushes across my face. The serene landscape surrounding me is pulling me into its captivating scene. My mind is at peace. I have completely forgotten where I am. I have forgotten who I am. I want to stay lost in this moment forever. I open my eyes and I no longer see the blue skies and enthralling mountainous terrain. I only see darkness. I have snapped back to reality and I must face the circumstances presented before me head on. He is going to take me away and to where I do not know.  I am curled up in a corner on the floor of our one bedroom apartment. Not long after my dads first suicide attempt, we were forced to relocate due to our abhorrent living

Discovering Suicide

  I understood what suicide was at a very young age. After my mother died, my dad struggled to cope. He chronically abused alcohol and would feel deeply sorry for himself. I understand he was only 35 years old when my mother died and he had several children to take care of. My family was by no means wealthy. We lived in a small townhouse. There were 3 bedrooms upstairs with a full bath. There was somewhat of an open concept downstairs. The kitchen led into the dining room and the dining room and living room looked as if it was one large room. My parents separated the two by placing a couch in between them and a sofa table behind it. My mother did not work and my father collected disability. It wasn’t until years later that I learned about his schizophrenia diagnosis.  From what I can remember my dad has always been a heavy drinker but, after my mom died I don’t think I ever saw him without a beer in his hand. Canadian Molson was his preference. If he was desperate he would settle

Crossing Boundaries

Lately it has felt like I have reached an impasse when it comes to my depression and anxiety. I am at a dead end and I am certain that I am destined  to fail at life. I am not meant to be successful. All of my confidence has been stripped from me and I have officially hit rock bottom. I don’t know how to pull myself out of the darkness. It’s as if I’m standing outside, naked and exposed. I’m exhausted and I just want it all to be over.  This is me at 12 years old before I was placed in foster care for a year. I have now been experiencing abuse for 3 years. I’m tired and I don’t feel like a little girl anymore. I feel like a grown woman who lives in the 1700s or something. I must get myself ready and prepare for my nightly coitus with my husband. Only, I am not waiting for my husband, I am fearfully waiting for my abuser. I am laying in bed, covers tightly wrapped around my body, my hands are fixed to my side.  My eyes are wide and my lips are tightly shut. I hear heavy footsteps h

My Earliest Memory

  My earliest memory from childhood seems to be from about the age of 9 years old. I have vague memories from an earlier time. Snippets of things lIke being a cheerleader in pop warner football or the car that my parents used to drive. I don’t remember the color or any details about it, just that it was a station wagon. Clearly, I have no significant memories from an earlier age.   When I was 8ish my mother was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. I can remember her having treatments and losing her hair. She wore a wig but hated the way it felt so she preferred to wear a bandana. I can almost picture her petite build and some of her facial features. Although, without a picture I am certain the ability to visualize her would have faded long ago. I can’t remember her voice or her demeanor. I imagine a kind, caring mother. Nothing has indicated otherwise and I hope that never changes. It’s soothing to think that I inherited some good from at least one of my parents. I’m not sure